blazesketball

I realized recently that I’ve never actually been able to bring myself to watch any amount of Game 7 of the 2000 Western Conference Finals. For those of you who don’t know / have chosen to block it out and are thus now upset with me for having brought it up, Game 7 of the 2000 Western Conference Finals is perhaps the most infamous defeat in the history of the Trail Blazers, a history which is basically just a series of infamous defeats.

As legend goes, the Blazers led the Lakers by 15 in the fourth quarter, only to collapse in epic fashion- in part due to a famed lob from Kobe to Shaq. These are pretty much all of the specific things that I remember. I was too young to have any real reference for what had happened, as the game took place shortly after my sixth birthday, but I remember everyone around me being devastated in a way that I didn’t really understand. I was heartbroken, certainly, but in my mind I felt as though surely there would be more games of this magnitude. They’d win the title the next year, or the year after that, or the year after the year after that. Sixteen years later, and they’re yet to make it back.

I decided to confront the lingering pain and finally re-watch Game 7 in its entirety and transcribe my thoughts as they occurred in real time (this is a convoluted way of saying that I’m basically going to be live-tweeting sans Twitter). For the sake of brevity I’m only going to write on the fourth quarter, though I watched the first three in a pursuit of emotional thoroughness.

In Game 7, the Blazers were attempting to become just the seventh team to ever come back from a 3-1 deficit, having won Game 5 and Game 6 in convincing fashion (in Los Angeles and Portland, respectively). Despite early foul trouble for Arvydas Sabonis, the Blazers dominated the Lakers aside from a small portion of the second quarter. Shaq had been almost completely neutralized, and the Blazers were punishing the Lakers by playing up-tempo and frequently posting up either Rasheed Wallace or Steve Smith. With 20 seconds left in the third, Scottie Pippen hit a step-back three, then instantly turned around and talking shit at Phil Jackson. The crowd at Staples Center was in a state of disbelief. The Blazers ended the quarter on a 21-7 run, and it would have been 21-4 had Brian Shaw not banked in a three pointer just before the end of the third.

One quarter separated the Blazers from the Finals; this is what followed.

End of the Third Quarter. Blazers 71, Lakers 58

There’s a wide array of early-2000s celebrities in attendance: Selma Hayek, Will Smith, several people I’ve never heard of, Pete Sampras, Samuel L. Jackson, Denzel Washington, Jack Nicholson with a moustache, etc.

Bob Costas listing reasons why the Lakers coming up short would be a massive disappointment: Shaq was one vote away from being named unanimous MVP. Kobe was second-team All-NBA and first-team All-Defense. Phil Jackson is Phil Jackson. The team went 67-15 in the regular season.

Bill Walton’s doing color commentary, and he’s already said ‘in the history of basketball’ at least three times by my count.

I don’t specifically remember where I was for this game but I was definitely wearing my Bonzi Wells jersey.

RIP NBA on NBC. Greatest theme song of all time.

11:05 Fourth Quarter. Blazers 73, Lakers 60

I definitely think of Rick Fox as his character in Holes first and as a basketball player second. Sweet Feet a legend forever.

Sheed talking oodles of shit out there.

We’re thoroughly outplaying them. If I wasn’t a person in the future I’d feel really confident right about now.

10:28 Fourth Quarter. Blazers 75, Lakers 60

Bonzi gets to the line after drawing a foul on Sweet Feet. People blow airhorns as he shoots his foul shots.

Phil Jackson’s wearing one of his championship rings, but as they do a close-up of it he puts his head down in disgust at the way his team is playing. This is poetry.

Sheed checking back in.

This basically couldn’t be going any better.

How did we fuck this up. There’s no way we found a way to fuck this up.

9:58 Fourth Quarter, Blazers 72 Lakers 62

Shaq gets super deep position and hits one off glass on Sabonis. This must be where it starts.

Kobe volleyball spikes a Bonzi floater. This is definitely where it starts.

Crowd starts to make actual noise again.

Bob Costas sounds like a guy doing a Bob Costas impression.

B-Shaw hits a corner three. Dunleavy calls timeout. Lead down to 10.

9:12 Fourth Quarter. Blazers 75, Lakers 66.

Pippen misses a step-back three. Blazers playing slower and far less assertive.

Kobe gets fouled on a breakaway layup by Wells.

Bonzi has a look on his face that isn’t particularly encouraging, Dunleavy also starting to look spooked.

Kobe makes one of two. Free throws: Blazers 12/14, Lakers 10/20

Walton gets roasted when he claims that Kobe should lead the league in free throw percentage.

8:24 Fourth Quarter. Blazers 75, Lakers 67.

Shaq chicken-wings Sabonis with an elbow. Sabonis called for a foul, his fifth. Dunleavy extremely animated on the sideline.

Brian Grant checks in and immediately gets absolutely destroyed on the offensive glass by Shaq, Sheed is forced to foul to prevent an easy bucket.

Mike Dunleavy Jr. sitting behind the Blazer bench. If my memory’s correct he was the third pick in the 2002 Draft, so that would mean he just finished his sophomore year at Duke. He totally looks like he just finished his sophomore year at Duke too, if that means anything.

7:02 Fourth Quarter. Blazers 75, Lakers 70.

Robert Horry grabs an offensive rebound, then backs it out and hits a three.

All any of these guys ever do is shoot contested midrange jumpers. GERALD HENDERSON WOULD FUCKING KILL IN THIS LEAGUE.

You can pretty clearly see the difference Sabonis makes defensively. Grant, being undersized, allows Shaq to set up shop deep in the post. When he gets doubled, he kicks it out and eventually somebody finds a shooter on a swing or finds an angle and drives. They look like a completely different team.

10-0 run.

5:01 Fourth Quarter. Blazers 75, Lakers 72.

Sheed misses a fadeaway, Kobe comes down and hits an elbow jumper. Lead cut to three.

Blazers have missed 10 shots in a row. Why did I decide to do this.

Shaq just straight up fucking erases a Brian Grant layup, rebound goes out to Sheed who misses a 17 footer over the backboard and out of bounds. 12 misses in a row.

4:03 Fourth Quarter. Blazers 75, Lakers 75.

B-Shaw cans an open three after Smith leaves to help on Shaq. Tie game.

Costas can barely contain his excitement. Crowd going insane.

Sabonis checks back in.

Sheed misses another shot. 13 in a row. Blazers haven’t scored in seven minutes. This is what nightmares are.

Kobe misses a jumper, Sabonis finds Sheed under the basket at the end of the shot clock and THEY FINALLY SCORE POINTS.

Sabonis fouls out (on some ticky-tac you-don’t-call-that-there bullshit).

Bill Walton says ‘in the history of basketball’ for the fourth time. I don’t think I can do this.

2:08 Fourth Quarter, Blazers 77, Lakers 79

Lakers take the lead on a Shaq turnaround.

Sheed appears to block a Kobe runner clean, but gets called for the foul and proceeds to fall to the ground and roll over in disgust.

Kobe hits both free throws, ruining a potentially epic ball don’t lie.

Sheed gets fouled off the ball by Shaq, misses both free throws. He looked at the second one for so long that he probably never had a chance at it.

THESE PEOPLE DON’T EVEN REALIZE THEY’RE ONLY LIKE THREE AND A HALF YEARS AWAY FROM SMUSH PARKER.

1:09 Fourth Quarter. Blazers 79, Lakers 83.

Kobe hits a pullup jumper. Lakers by four.

Pippen misses a three.

Lakers take the ball up the floor with under a minute left.

This looks eerily familiar…

Holy shit. FUCK. NOOOOO. This is where this happens huh. FUUUUUUUUUCK. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Shaq throws The Lob to Shaq.

…………

……

…

Wow.

I did not understand the context of that at all. That was physically painful to watch.

Alright then.

… So basically the anatomy of The Lob was as follows: Kobe beat Pippen off the dribble with a crossover to his left, which forced Grant to leave Shaq and contest what he thought was a shot attempt. Instead, Kobe threw a genius and slightly out of character pass to Shaq, who caught it at its apex and dunked all over Sheed, who was late to slide over and help. It was an incredible play, which is hard to swallow because you’re admitting this to yourself as you watch the hopes and dreams of your city’s only team get pushed into the river.

The Blazers call timeout. The shook Mr. Krabs meme didn’t exist yet but it would aptly describe the reactions of the players and coaching staff.

Blazer Twitter wouldn’t have been able to handle this.

Damn.

0:34 Fourth Quarter, Blazers 82, Lakers 85.

Sheed hits a 27 footer out of the timeout though.

Blazers intentionally foul Ron Harper, who hits one of two.

Free throws: Blazers: 12/16, Lakers: 17/29

Steve Smith gets hit to the floor really hard by Shaq on an aggressive take to the rim. Clearly a foul.

No call.

Dunleavy, Smith and all three announcers are perplexed.

Blazers are forced to intentionally foul.

Kobe misses both.

Free throws: Blazers 12/16, Lakers 17/31. Hmmmmmmm.

0:11 Fourth Quarter. Lakers 88, Blazers 84.

Smith misses a long two, Horry gets fouled as he grabs the rebound.

Camera pans to the bench. Sabonis looks like he’s about to cry very large tears.

Horry makes both. Stoudemire comes back down and hits a layup. Schrempf fouls Horry. 11.2 seconds left. Lakers by four.

Crowd starts singing “Na na na na hey hey hey goodbye” as Horry misses both free throws.

Bonzi misses a pullup three. Schrempf again fouls Horry, who makes one of two.

Fourth quarter free throws: Blazers: 2/4, Lakers 10/18.

Schrempf dribbles the ball up but doesn’t get a shot off. Buzzer sounds.

Final: Lakers 89, Blazers 84.

———–

To say that the refs had it in for the Blazers and thus they lost would be too simple. However, to say that the game took place on an even playing field would be relatively disingenuous. Despite the Blazers being forced to foul at the end and the difficulties that came with reffing Shaq in his prime, there should never be such a disparity between fourth quarter free throw attempts; even Tim Donaghy probably laughed at such a total. Referee conspiracies aside, however, what ultimately decided the game was the Blazers missing 13 shots in a row down the stretch. That generally isn’t a formula for winning basketball.

Seventh games of series deep in the playoffs carry with them a distinctly precarious element of totality, of do-or-die, of the potential for instantaneous alteration of career narratives (shouts to Steph Curry). The Lakers would go on to three-peat, and the Blazers would go on to become commonly referred to as the Jail Blazers. One of these is better than the other.

Had the Blazers hung on, they would have had home-court advantage in a series against a Pacers team which had gone 56-26 in the regular season, and whose best player was arguably Jalen Rose. Whether or not this resulted in a championship (which it probably would have), the Kobe and Shaq Lakers quite possible could have crumbled four years ahead of schedule under the weight of such a staggering collapse and the ensuing media narratives. Or they could have formed an unbreakable bond and gone on to win eight championships in a row. I’m not really sure. Predicting the future is a fickle business.

All I know is that there’s an alternate universe where Sheed was MVP of the 2000 Finals and paraded through downtown Portland with two giant, gold trophies and a smile on his face, and that’s the universe in which I wish to live.